Waratah Tree flower by Tatters:) Letting it all hang out — supposedly being our real selves — is a most difficult thing to do.
We all have expectations of others albeit most are probably unconscious. Based on another's appearance, dress and speech we make assumptions and when they do not pan out disappoinment sets in and judgement shows up.
The same shows up and we feel vindicated then we say "I knew it; what can you expect from those kind of people".
Everyone wanta to be liked and admired for what we bring to the proverbial table but do we even know what that is.
As Stefan Shuem, a Dutch shaman, said in an interview on Law of Attraction (Blog Talk Radio) Radio "when you're young, you don't have your mind" and as a consequence, when children are abused in any way it is impossible to rationalise the adult's actions.
Be careful the environment you choose for it will shape you. Be careful the friends you choose for you will become like them. ~W. Clement Stone
We do all that we can to be liked, even loved, embraced and accepted as part of the prevailing group. Many will do absolutely anything to get in and stay in and that is usually to their detriment.
In my case, I dressed like the other women in my two-piece suits and blouses to be part of the popular group and thought I was being accepted. Unfortunately that is not the way it works.
Discord occurs when there is no meeting of minds or sharing of values and thus, no cohesiveness when the only thing that keeps the group together is breaking down those who are not like them.
The needs of the few conflict with that of the majority.
Those shunned either take the high road or the low road – depending on perspective – by deciding to remain with the masses because that is where they feel "safe", in other words their specialness is hidden but what happens to those left on their own.
Either they get kicked around like a football by life's events and decide to withdraw and rage or after getting knocked down countless times eventually decide to rise up, slowly and inexorably, to stand teetering on their legs, open and vulnerable to the world and feeling thoroughly defenseless not knowing what to do next.
Love and self-acceptance is the only way to win out against negative forces and the means to do that is within us. It's called silence. When we become still we can hear the quiet behind the every day sounds. I for one tend to resist this part because perversely, I prefer to roll around in the shite that is not working!
The superb folks at DailyOM say:
Vulnerable by Himalayan Trails We can avoid falling under the influence of individuals whose ideas and opinions we disagree with by taking a moment to collect our thoughts when we feel we are being pressured.
It may seem that there are a number of nefarious forces directing the course our lives take. Yet only a few short minutes of focused contemplation in which we examine the roots of the vulnerability we feel can help us reconnect with our core values and remind us that we are and always will be in full control of our destinies.
When we stop to think before we are swept up in the tide of outside beliefs and opinions, we temporarily separate ourselves from the suggestions capable of swaying us and thus our overall susceptibility is diminished. The impressions others make on you today will not be as intense when you center yourself in the midst of challenging interpersonal interactions.
More words to nourish:
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